DoD Institutes Musical Path to the PhD

Stephen Ellis, a prominent deviant in a Top Department Elsewhere has observed that the DoD is unclear about the guidelines for its graduate students.  As well as woefully, inexplicably without any music.  Seeking to kill two birds with one stone and also keep too many Grad College cooks out of our kitchen, we have devised the following musical plan toward the PhD in Deviance:

Admission to Candidacy will occur upon public performance of “Drop Kick me, Dogen, Through the Goalposts of Grad School” (to be sung to the tune of “Drop Kick me,Jesus”).

As Ellis notes, PhD committee composition may prove tricky.  Owing to the permeable boundaries between self and other, inside and outside, and all of that, we think it best if graduate students break into song.  And be on their own committees.  Specifically, they shall sing “I Am My Own Outside Member” (to be sung to the tune of “I am my own Grandpaw”) both upon formation of the committee and any time their confidence wanes.