We
here at the DoD generally try to steer clear of controversy over canons. The fact that our own canon is perennially –
nay, eternally! – under construction really helps with this. As does the fact that our modest work is
largely ignored in the vast reaches of Normalcy. As we’ve learned from our dealings with
admin, being forgotten by the powers-that-be can be a blessing. Cats being away, mice playing, and all of
that. Most of the time, it’s practically
Mouse-a-palooza around here. Not lately,
alas.
Despite
our best efforts, the DoD recently came under fire for its indifference to
Normalcy. We may not have a competing
canon, sure, but our efforts are proving a distraction to those who do. While we carry on in our quest to know more things, some of the things
already Normally known may yet not be totally
known. How, our critics implored, can
you advocate for Deviance when Normality is not yet, not quite, not
totalizingly, absolutely everywhere? Priorities, people!
Shocked,
we decided to offer an apologia for
our work. And we decided to call it an “apologia” too, since throwing in a
little Greek when you can reassures the Normal that however Deviant you may be,
you have been put through the Normal paces. While we achieved unanimous agreement on what
to call what we were about to do, departmental opinion swiftly divided over
less interesting details, like what to actually say.
On
the one hand were the Deviants who wanted to vigorously resist this bit of
apparent Normal greed. After all, in contemporary academia, the Normal are many
and the Deviant few, so it seems churlish to begrudge the Deviant their attentions
to things Deviant. Or to begrudge them
commending the Deviant to others, even if that entails that not every single scrap
of Normalcy will get funding and attention.
Commending things to others is part of the whole academic business after
all. And, to be sure, if some scrap of
Normal does get neglected long enough, who knows? Maybe it can become Deviant too!
On
the other hand were Deviants who simply wanted to reassure the Normal that we
mean them no harm and carry no bias against them however much we may ignore
them. Yea, verily, some of our best
friends are Normal. (If you ask us to
name them, we’ll have to get back to you on that. Sorry.)
Our only trouble is that we are mortal and our budget finite. We’ve heard it said that there is only so
much one can be expected to try to know and only so much that can be funded. We tend not to alibi our neglect of things
this way, but hey, the irony here is just too delicious to resist.
On
still another hand, the truly pugnacious among us wanted to engage in a little
armchair psychoanalytics and speculate about what dark fears may lurk in the
hearts of Normal. Perhaps, these
Deviants wondered, Normality is worried about threats to its dominance? After all, when we teach Deviance, students
do seem to like it. And some of the ones
who like it are Deviant. If that keeps
up, Deviant could become the new Normal. This faction of the department, in short,
wanted to throw out an admittedly smug “don’t hate us because we’re beautiful”
response to it all.
On
yet a still additional hand were those who thought it would be rich to offer
neglected Normal a little advice, not unlike that often offered ourselves. The trick here, we would say, is to do good work that Normal People will like
and the attention will follow. While we
ourselves typically bypass this patronizing path toward Normality and instead
wander off into the thickets of our own fancy, maybe others will find it
appealing and plausible.
Most
persuasively, on the final hand, a wise and seasoned professor emerita of
Deviance advised that the best apologia
is silence. After all, give the Normal
five minutes and they’ll forget we Deviants exist again.
For
those of you counting the number of hands we have, it’s true that we have more
than the usual two. We are many handed,
not unlike Shiva the Destroyer.
Team Delicious Irony here ....
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